Week 7 Lines
Reminder: Bets have to be in Saturday night by midnight in order to be considered on time.
The Top Ten: Week 7
Commentary: Before going into the commentary, a few programming updates. We are two weeks away from the highly anticipated MIDSEASON REPORT. As we approach the second half, remember that all Thursday night games (except for Thanksgiving) will be off the board. Also, remember that NINE total teams make the playoffs. The four division winners, and the top five overall franchises that are non-division winners (wild card teams). Winning percentage is the tiebreaker. Once the second half of the season starts, the wild card standings will be at the bottom of the weekly standings sheet. Now on with the show.
In Week 6, two franchises hit on their wild card bets, but not in a huge way, as they both had trouble stringing bets together. The division winners stayed where they were, except for in the South where The People’s Champ took over. Ron Mexico increased his lead and could look to distance himself in Week 7. So far, 6 franchises have placed their wild card bet. 22 franchises still have it on the shelf.
(current total; last week’s ranking)
1. Ron Mexico ($600, 1)
A new mainstay at the top of the rankings? Ron went 1-0-1 this week and increased his overall lead and lead in the West.
2. Karl Farbman ($200, 3)
K-Farb eked out $100, but stays atop the East.
3. The People’s Champ ($200, 4)
The Champ also only won $100 this week, but due to the rest of his division faltering, takes the lead in the South. It seems as though the cream is beginning to rise to the top.
4. The Beard of Zeus ($200, 6)
Nice week of picks by the Beard. He was only an Indy push away from a perfect week. His lead is now $400 in the North.
5. Gordon Bombay ($0, NR)
And just like that, in one single week, Bombay is back in the mix. $500 won on two games. He made it look easy.
6. Mr. DeBlasis (-$100, 8 )
DeBlasis is hanging around and might be onto something by betting lots of games in this topsy-turvy season. His overall record is 10-7-2, which is a winning percentage of 0.579, which leads the league.
7. Face (-$200, 9)
Face clawed his way to a small gain this week. If he could get hot this week, the division lead is in his sights.
8. Boss Hardigan (-$100, NR)
A solid week by Boss Hardigan has him within shouting distance of Ron Mexico.
9. Teddy KGB (-$200, 2)
What goes up, must come down. After two perfect weeks, Teddy loses $500. He’s a few weeks early on his annual November swoon.
10. Slovy Maximus (-$200, NR)
Slovy won his wild card, but only gained $400 overall for the week. Still, he’s right in the playoff hunt.
OTHERS RECEIVING VOTES: Yaz; Mr. Marbles; Kenny Powers; Will Cover
DROPPED OUT: The Notorious A.B.T.; Kenny Powers; Art Schlichter
Week 7 Standings
East
| Karl Farbman | $200 |
| Mr. DeBlasis | -$100 |
| Kenny Powers | -$300 |
| Larisa Oleynik | -$600 |
| Bayonnaise | -$800 |
| The 21th Precinct | -$1,000 |
| The Phoenix | -$1,100 |
North
| The Beard of Zeus | $200 |
| Face | -$200 |
| Kimmy Gibbler | -$500 |
| Kiko Garica | -$500 |
| Babe | -$600 |
| Waldo Geraldo Faldo | -$800 |
| T-Ferg | -$900 |
South
| The People’s Champ | $200 |
| Teddy KGB | -$200 |
| Mr. Marbles | -$300 |
| Yaz | -$300 |
| Will Cover | -$600 |
| Art Schlichter | -$800 |
| Blossom Russo | -$2,100 |
West
| Ron Mexico | $600 |
| Gordon Bombay | $0 |
| Boss Hardigan | -$100 |
| Slovy Maximus | -$200 |
| The Notorious A.B.T. | -$400 |
| Rick Moranis | -$1,400 |
| Don Mattingly | -$1,600 |
Overall Leader
| Ron Mexico | $600 |
| The People’s Champ | $200 |
| The Beard of Zeus | $200 |
| Karl Farbman | $200 |
| Gordon Bombay | $0 |
Week 6 Picks
As I See It: Karl Farbman
As part of a new running feature, each Friday one franchise owner will have the opportunity to write whatever they want in this space. This week’s we are hearing from an old favorite: Karl Farbman. Karl take it away….
Last week, Don Mattingly’s story about the Chiefs reminded me of something. It’s the story of the greatest gambling moment I have ever been a part of.
In the fall of 2004, I was studying in London for the semester. Even though there was a big time difference, my roommates and I would stay up to watch Sunday and Monday Night Football each week (which started around 1:30am GMT). During the 2004 season, my online gambling account was dormant. I told myself at the beginning of the year that it would be too hard to follow the injuries and the ebb and flow of the season to bet the games week in and week out.
In late October, I got an email from the online site that said something like, “Where have you been? We’ve missed your business. We’d like you to come back, so here is a free $200 in your account.”
Now, it just seemed like a no-brainer to bet games. If I lost the money, no big deal. If I won, I vowed to withdraw it from the account once I returned to the States.
Those next six weeks or so, I was up and down with wins and losses. I was relying on a lot of online research during the week to make my picks, which was still no where near how comprehensive it is today. I spent a couple hours every Thursday in the university computer lab trying to read as much as possible. While I was doing this, my fellow students in the lab were raving about some new internet site called, “Facebook.”
With one week to go in the semester, there was a meaningless December Monday night game on the docket. It was the Chiefs playing against the Titans in Tennessee. Both teams had no chance of making the playoffs, so pride was really all that was on the line. The Chiefs were 1.5 point underdogs. I had a feeling they were going to win big, riding the golden arm of Trent Green. I decided to bet the adjusted line, which made the Chiefs a big favorite, but paid off at 3 to 1. So I put a considerable chunk of my account on Kansas City favored by 7.5.
The game was a shootout with a lot of twists and turns. First the Titans went up by 14 (putting me down by 21.5 early), but the Chiefs came roaring back. In a see-saw battle, the Titans kicked a field goal with 2:26 to go to take a 38-35 lead.
I was sunk. No way I could cover the 7.5 spread. Two minutes to go and I would need two touchdowns to do it.
The Chiefs got the ball back, and Green engineered a magnificent drive down the field, finding Eddie Kennison in the end zone to take a 42-38 lead with 32 seconds to play.
It was an entertaining game, but I was pissed. The Chiefs had played good enough to win, but not to cover the adjusted spread.
The Titans got the ball back and threw a couple of incomplete passes. With about 20 seconds left and some 70 yards to make up, they needed a big play. Billy Volek dropped back to pass and threw a short slant route. The Titans tight end attempted to lateral the ball to a streaking receiver, but the timing was off. The ball was fumbled.
Chiefs defender Kawika Mitchell picked up the ball and ran untouched into the end zone, scoring with 8 seconds left. Chiefs win 49-38.
I was going insane at 4:30 in the morning across the pond. The play happened so quickly that I thought I was delirious and making things up. But then I watched the replay over and over. The impossible had happened. The announcers saw it as a meaningless final score, but to me it was a miraculous finish.
I recently unearthed a video of this game (pay attention to the last 45 seconds or so): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W7cb8-BkQBk
Also, the box score of the game in question can be found here: http://espn.go.com/nfl/boxscore?gameId=241213010
It’s the type of story I’ll tell my grandkids.
Week 6 Lines
Reminder: Bets must be in by Saturday night at midnight in order to be considered on time.
The Top Ten: Week 6
Commentary: In yet another week where underdogs covered most of the spreads, the FMFL suffered once again. However, two franchises, Ron Mexico and Kimmy Gibbler, were bold enough to bet their respective wild cards. Both won, and Ron is now among the league leaders, and Gibbler might be back in the race in the North. Several teams lost $500 and now there are only three franchises in the positive. One of those is Teddy KGB, who rose from mediocrity with a perfect week and now leads the South.
(current total; last week’s ranking)
1. Ron Mexico ($300, NR)
Ron bellied up to the bar – and got plenty drunk. Won his wild card bet. Won his second bet. $1,000 in the books for the week. Mexico now leads the West and is in a tie for the overall lead.
2. Teddy KGB ($300, 9)
Teddy jumps up to first in the South with a huge $500 week. With five weeks in the books, the lead in the division has changed nearly every week. Teddy is now in the driver’s seat.
3. Karl Farbman ($100, 1)
A terrible week for Farbman. With three losses, he drops $500, but still maintains the lead in the East.
4. The People’s Champ ($100, NR)
The Champ treaded water in Week 5 and rose up in the division due to all of the dogs covering. Time to play that wild card?
5. The Notorious A.B.T. (-$100, 5)
The A.B.T. is behind in the West, and might have to come up with a big week in order to keep pace with Ron Mexico.
6. The Beard of Zeus (-$100, 6)
Much like Karl Farbman, didn’t have a great week, but still holds onto the division lead.
7. Kenny Powers (-$100, 2)
Kenny dropped $500. But he can now blame his new bride.
8. Mr. DeBlasis (-$300, 3)
DeBlasis dropped $500. But he can now blame his hetero-life partner.
9. Face (-$300, 10)
Face is close in the North. He might be the “Teddy KGB” of Week 6 if he can string two bets together.
10. Art Schlichter (-$300, NR)
Art fancies himself a gambling man, but has struggled to this point. He could go into a shell and bet a five-teamer, but my guess is that Art will be the next to bet his wild card.
OTHERS RECEIVING VOTES: Boss Hardigan; Mr. Marbles; Gordon Bombay
DROPPED OUT: Mr. Marbles; The Phoenix; Yaz
Week 6 Standings
East
| Karl Farbman | $100 |
| Kenny Powers | -$100 |
| Mr. DeBlasis | -$300 |
| The Phoenix | -$600 |
| Bayonnaise | -$900 |
| The 21th Precinct | -$1,100 |
| Larisa Oleynik | -$1,100 |
North
| The Beard of Zeus | -$100 |
| Face | -$300 |
| Babe | -$500 |
| Kimmy Gibbler | -$600 |
| T-Ferg | -$1,100 |
| Kiko Garcia | -$1,100 |
| Waldo Geraldo Faldo | -$1,200 |
South
| Teddy KGB | $300 |
| The People’s Champ | $100 |
| Art Schlichter | -$300 |
| Mr. Marbles | -$300 |
| Yaz | -$600 |
| Will Cover | -$1,100 |
| Blossom Russo | -$2,000 |
West
| Ron Mexico | $300 |
| The Notorious A.B.T. | -$100 |
| Boss Hardigan | -$300 |
| Gordon Bombay | -$500 |
| Slovy Maximus | -$600 |
| Rick Moranis | -$1,400 |
| Don Mattingly | -$1,500 |
Overall Leader
| Teddy KGB | $300 |
| Ron Mexico | $300 |
| The People’s Champ | $100 |
| Karl Farbman | $100 |
| Kenny Powers | -$100 |
Week 5 Picks
As I See It: Don Mattingly
As part of a new running feature, each Friday one franchise owner will have the opportunity to write whatever they want in this space. This week’s we are scraping the bottom of the barrel – Don Mattingly. Don, take it away….
It was merely three years ago, yet it seems like a lifetime ago. It was October 2007, an unseasonably mild month, in which the Legend of the Chiefs began.
Fall 2007 was an interesting time for me. I entered the autumnal season after a bizarre August and September that left me not much different than Bill Murray at the beginning of Stripes. I spent my days constantly wearing a bandana as a headband, surfing Career Builder, and listening to hour-long Phish songs. When I wasn’t serving Half and Half’s to Gary Thorne at the James Joyce, my nights were spent carousing around town, pathetically spending my last pennies on the trivia machine at Rafters.
Unlike any other time in my life, I had neither the time nor motivation to sit in front of my computer for hours on end researching box scores and fantasy stats (Ironically enough, I DID have time to play about 20 seasons of Baseball Mogul in which Jim Thome won 15 MVP awards including one well talked about season in which he blasted 80 homers and drove in 200 runs!). I couldn’t even tell you a single player from my pathetic 2007 fantasy football team. Needless to say, I definitely didn’t have the interest to try and sort through weekly NFL lines and pick teams for this so-called up and coming Funny Money league which I had just joined a month before (I confess. I had Antonio Gates). Then, one night, it all changed…
As legend has it, I had bet late for about three consecutive weeks, but one Saturday night at approximately 11:56 PM, I remembered I had to place my bets, so I blindly texted the Executive Director (at this time, we could still use this archaic method) my two favorite teams… $300 Giants/$200 Chiefs. The pick was in. I had no idea who they were playing, what the spread was, or if they were even playing at all that week, but the deed was done. The Giants, at the time, were middling in mediocrity, Coughlin’s job on the line, while the Chiefs were off to a surprisingly good start. What was I thinking with these picks? I was already in dead last. Could it get any worse? What happened next was a mythical rollercoaster ride the likes that had not been seen since the great Johnny Appleseed.
As was customary of this period, we all met at Don’t Know the next day. Wouldn’t you know…the Giants registered double digit sacks on Sunday Night Football, while the Chiefs smashed the Chargers. The following week came around, and I rolled the dice again… $300 Giants/$200 Chiefs. Covers again! Was I on to something here? Little did we know at the time that this was going to be the Giants’ Super Bowl season and they were sneakily good at covering, while it only took some garbage time screen from Trent Green to Larry Johnson when the opposition was playing Kutler’s prevent D for them to cover their enormously large spreads. The ride continued throughout October…$300 Giants/$200 Chiefs…spawning a new handshake, Don’t Know Rumplemintz sales through the roof, and even, at its apex, me being thrown into the side of a Mercedes on Light Street.
But alas, as quickly as the meteoric rise of $300 Giants/$200 Chiefs had taken place, the fall was just as abrupt. By the end of October, gone was the time fighting corporate. I was back in the cubicle, back in the khakis, back to pretending to work on some random spreadsheet, back to 15 minute Dead jams, and back to tirelessly obsessing over fantasy sports. Gone was the freewheeling $300 Giants/$200 Chiefs; in was the conservative $200 Indy/$200 Pats/$100 Titans picks, and gone were any hopes I had at trying to be good at Funny Money.
So, here we are – 3 years later. The Giants are middling in mediocrity; Tom Coughlin’s job is on the line, but they did just have a double digit sack game on Sunday Night Football. The Chiefs are off to a surprisingly good start. I am dead last in Funny Money. I’m putting the league on notice. This Sunday, I’ll be the guy enjoying chicken salad, on rye, untoasted …with a cup of tea!
