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Week 17 Power Rankings

Funny Money Power Rankings - Week 17

The penultimate week of the second season of Funny Money Football played out like a chess match, with most franchises maneuvering themselves for what should be a crazy final week. Last week's playoff teams Bummy and the People's Champ bet conservatively and saw other franchises move past them. Five wild card bets remain, and a few of them are sure to be put in play in the last week.

Here are your updated power rankings:

Biggest rise: The 21th Precinct: was 10, now 5; Brian Piccolo: was 12, now 7; Chris B. Corey: was 13, now 8
Biggest drop: Mr. DeBlasis: was 8, now 13

(Last week's rank; Current total)

1. Blossom Russo (1; $3,400)

Won $500 on the week and looks to have a stranglehold on the overall championship.

2. Gordon Bombay (3; $2,700)

Holding on for the North title, but nothing's over yet. Still has a shot at the big money, too, the regular season crown.

3. Mr. Marbles (2; $2,300)

Locked up a playoff spot, but can focus his Week 17 efforts on winning the division.

4. Kimmy Gibbler (4; $1,900)

Wow. Four teamer. Four big wins. Though he hasn't run away with the South title yet, it will be tough for him to blow the lead he established last week.

5. The 21th Precinct (10; $800)

Won his wild card bet, which vaulted him to the top of the wild, wild West division.

6. Karl Farbman (5; $700)

Still in playoff position, and still has his wild card bet. The possible scenarios are making Farbman's head hurt.

7. Brian Piccolo (12; $600)

A HUGE week for Piccolo. Won $500 and, out of nowhere, is a playoff team if the season ended today. He needs another big week to make it to the postseason.

8. Chris B. Corey (13; $500)

Speaking of big weeks, Chris B. Corey, back from the dead, is on the doorstep of the playoffs. The Giants going for a TD instead of a FG in overtime gave him a $500 week.

9. The People's Champ (6; $400)

Five teamer. Lost $100. Lost playoff status. But still has wild card bet. Look out in Week 17.

10. Bummy (7; $400)

Five teamer as well. Lost $100 as well. Lost playoff status as well.

11. Thunder Lips (9; $300)

A dangerous franchise with one week to go, Thunder Lips still has his wild card bet and might need it to jump over a few teams to get into the playoffs.

12. Bayonnaise (11; $100)

Bayonnaise needs to string together a perfect week in order for his season to continue.

13. Mr. DeBlasis (8; -$100)

Eek, Mr. DeBlasis lost $500 and will need some help to get a whiff of the playoffs.

14. Teddy KGB (15; -$300)

Got off the losing schnide by picking one game that was right last week! Still alive for the postseason, but will need to pick opposite of everyone above him.

15. Boss Hardigan (17; -$900)

A good finish would be nice for the Boss, who doesn't want to be in the cellar of the West.

16. Waldo Geraldo Faldo (14; -$1,000)

The same goes for Waldo, who, save for a few tough breaks, showed a lot in his rookie year.

17. Babe (16; -$1,200)

Babe lost $500. But what would be worse is falling behind the Beard of Zeus to end the season.

18. The Beard of Zeus (18; -$1,600)

Also dropped $500. But making a late charge for some respect in the East.

19. The Phoenix (19; -$2,600)

Actually won $100 but was fined for late picks. So didn't win anything. The story of the season.

20. Rick Moranis (20; -$3,200)

One week left. One more chance for Moranis to rise from last place....

Week 16 Power Rankings

Funny Money Power Rankings - Week 16

Another tough week league-wide. Those who lost a little fared well. There were also three push games, which prevented some from losing or winning a ton either way. As it sits now, three of the seven playoffs spots look to be locked up (Blossom Russo, Mr. Marbles, and Gordon Bombay, respectively), while the other four seem to be up for grabs. And three of the four division races are still in doubt. Six wild card bets remain, and oddly enough, all six teams are in the mix for the postseason. Two weeks left.

Here are your updated power rankings:

Biggest rise: Mr. DeBlasis: was 11, now 8; The 21th Precinct: was 13, now 10
Biggest drop: Babe: was 12, now 16

(Last week's rank; Current total)

1. Blossom Russo (3; $2,900)

Late bets, but still took over the league lead with two weeks to go. Good work, Ralphie. He's also clinched the East Division and a spot in the playoffs.

2. Mr. Marbles (2; $2,400)

The only franchise that is surging right now, Mr. Marbles is making a push for both his division and the overall lead.

3. Gordon Bombay (1; $2,800)

Bombay dropped a few hundo this week and saw his command over the league slip away.

4. Kimmy Gibbler (4; $1,400)

By just losing $100, Gibbler increased his divisional lead. The People's Champ still has his wild card bet, but a good Week 16 by Gibbler can put things almost out of reach in the South.

5. Karl Farbman (5; $800)

Broke even on the week and increased his lead on the rest of the West, but it is not a safe lead by any means.

6. The People's Champ (7; $500)

Currently holding on to one of the three wild card playoff berths. But, if he wants a chance at the cash, he'll probably have to use his big bet in the last two weeks.

7. Bummy (8; $500)

A model of consistency, Bummy has planted himself around $600 for what seems like months and would be in the playoffs if the season ended today.

8. Mr. DeBlasis (11; $400)

Late picks cost DeBlasis $100. If not, he'd be in position for the postseason.

9. Thunder Lips (6; $400)

No bets. Weak sauce.

10. The 21th Precinct (13; $200)

Trailing Farbman by $600 in the division, and just $300 behind in the wild card race. However, the Precinct still has his wild card bet.

11. Bayonnaise (10; $200)

Needs a solid week in order to be a factor in Week 17. There are a lot of people between him and the playoffs.

12. Brian Piccolo (9; $100)

Brian is $700 behind in the division, and $400 behind in the wild card race. Now would be a good time for a perfect week.

13. Chris B. Corey (14; $0)

Chris has crept around even money for weeks and is benefitting from the league taking it on the chin the last few weeks. If he can put together two solid groups of bets, he could be in the postseason.

14. Waldo Geraldo Faldo (16; -$500)

Not going to get it done. Waldo lost steam a few weeks back and hasn't been able to recapture the momentum he once had.

15. Teddy KGB (15; -$400)

Has lost $500 for four straight weeks. Wave goodbye to the playoffs.

16. Babe (12; -$700)

Lost $500. Adios.

17. Boss Hardigan (17; -$1,000)

Three's company: Boss Hardigan also lost $500. Good show.

18. The Beard of Zeus (18; -$1,100)

If a few bets would've gone the other way, the Zeus would be in the thick of it. But that's a big "if".

19. The Phoenix (19; -$2,600)

The Phoenix has packed it in for the offseason. Didn't bet last week, and isn't expected to bet from here on out.

20. Rick Moranis (20; -$3,300)

To his credit, Moranis keeps making bets. However, they are not good ones.

Week 15 Power Rankings

Funny Money Power Rankings - Week 15

Congratulations are in order for Mr. Marbles and Babe after Week 14 - They were the only two franchises that actually won money last week. Everyone else suffered, and suffered greatly. No one placed their Wild Card bet, so six still remain in play. And the playoff picture is becoming more and more crowded each week. Three weeks to go.

Here are your updated power rankings:

Biggest rise: Babe: was 18, now 12
Biggest drop:  The People's Champ: was 5, now 7; Teddy KGB: was 13, now 15; Boss Hardigan: was 15, now 17

(Last week's rank; Current total)

1. Gordon Bombay (1; $3,100)

Bombay dropped down slightly, but pulled away a bit for the overall lead. What's even more remarkable is that he still has his Wild Card bet on the shelf.

2. Mr. Marbles (3; $2,100)

Kudos for winning $100 on the week. Barring a complete meltdown, Mr. Marbles has a playoff spot locked up, but still can make a run at the division crown.

3. Blossom Russo (2; $2,700)

Fell out of the tie for the overall lead with an uncharacteristic -$500 week.

4. Kimmy Gibbler (4; $1,500)

Pulled out a big Monday Night Football win that gives him some breathing room in his divisional race.

5. Karl Farbman (7; $800)

Lost $300 on the week, yet increased his lead on everyone in his division. Farbman's betting style in the next few weeks will be very important.

6. Thunder Lips (6; $1,000)

The once methodical, strategic Thunder Lips lost $500 yet again and is inching closer and closer to the brink of the playoff standings.

7. The People's Champ (5; $800)

Late picks again for the self-proclaimed Champ. He's got his hands on the last playoff spot, but not by much.

8. Bummy (9; $700)

For weeks, Bummy has hovered right around $700, and finally the league has come back down to his level. He's now just $100 out of the playoffs.

9. Brian Piccolo (8; $400)

Dropped a couple of tough losses and is now $400 behind West Division leader Farbman.

10. Bayonnaise (10; $300)

A month ago, Bayonnaise was primed to take the South Division over. Now, he needs three solid weeks just to make the playoffs.

11. Mr. DeBlasis (11; $200)

Ditto for DeBlasis. He'll have to leap over a few people to get into the postseason.

12. Babe (18; -$200)

Props to Babe, the other franchise that won money last week. He needs a miracle to get a wild card berth to the playoffs, but judging by last week, anything can happen.

13. The 21th Precinct (12; $100)

Dropped $500 and is $700 back with three weeks to go. But, he still has his Wild Card bet in his pocket.

14. Chris B. Corey (14; -$200)

Had a chance to get back into the race this week, but missed out.

15. Teddy KGB (13; $100)

The downward spiral continues. Another week, another $500 loss.

16. Waldo Geraldo Faldo (16; -$400)

Still alive, but just barely.

17. Boss Hardigan (15; -$500)

Stick a fork in the Boss, he's done. After a valiant effort and comeback, losing $500 might have put him out of the race.

18. The Beard of Zeus (17; -$800)

The same goes for the Beard. He made it interesting.

19. The Phoenix (19; -$2,000)

Losing the race for last, the Phoenix only lost $500 in Week 14....

20. Rick Moranis (20; -$2,800)

....which couldn't match the $600 Moranis lost by having late picks. Yeesh.

Week 14 Power Rankings

Funny Money Power Rankings - Week 14

Week 13 turned into a bloodbath, as many of franchises in contention for the three wild card playoff spots lost money, including Teddy KGB and Bayonnaise losing $500, and Thunder Lips losing $600. Cleveland covering by one half of a point devastated  almost half the league. Gordon Bombay and Blossom Russo remain tied for the overall lead, with Bombay holding a slim .679 winning percentage tiebreaker, and Russo right behind at .671. In the West, Karl Farbman surged into first while the bottom of the division dropped behind.

Here are your updated power rankings:

Biggest rise: Karl Farbman: was 12, now 7; Bummy: was 14, now 9.
Biggest drop: Bayonnaise: was 6, now 10; Teddy KGB: was 9, now 13.

(Last week's rank; Current total)

1. Gordon Bombay (1; $3,200)

Plugging along, Bombay remains at the top of the heap.

2. Blossom Russo (2; $3,200)

Russo won another $300, staying hot, and is just mere percentage points behind the overall leader.

3. Mr. Marbles (5; $2,000)

Survived another week by squeaking out $100 and is still within shouting distance in the division. He has a firm grasp on the top wild card spot.

4. Kimmy Gibbler (4; $1,600)

Lost $100, but simply hanging in after Week 13 created some breathing room among the crowded South Division.

5. The People's Champ (7; $1,200)

In playoff position right now and just a few hundred dollars out of the money for the regular season.

6. Thunder Lips (3; $1,500)

Late picks yet again, then lost all his bets to boot. It seems as though his systematic betting system has gone to the wayside.

7. Karl Farbman (12; $1,100)

What a time for a perfect week. After struggling for about a month, winning $500 makes Farbman the new leader in the West.

8. Brian Piccolo (8; $900)

Piccolo is just $200 behind Farbman, but might need to beat him outright, as he is behind him in the tiebreaker.

9. Bummy (14; $800)

Hanging around, just hanging around. As the playoff spots continue to decrease, things are looking better and better for Bummy.

10. Bayonnaise (6; $800)

Last week he was just one good bet away from the division lead. Now he's in third place and on the outside looking in for the playoffs.

11. Mr. DeBlasis (11; $700)

Just one good week away from the postseason.

12. The 21th Precinct (10; $600)

Staying in the mix in the division, and also is on the fringe of a very crowded playoff picture.

13. Teddy KGB (9; $600)

The downward spiral continues. Teddy loses another $500 and drops out of the postseason picture - for the moment

14. Chris B. Corey (15; $100)

Going backwards at this point isn't going to do any good.

15. Boss Hardigan (13; $0)

Lost $500 on the week. The season seems to be slipping away....

16. Waldo Geraldo Faldo (16; -$100)

Fell back further out West, making Week 14 almost do or die for WGF.

17. The Beard of Zeus (18; -$300)

Won his Wild Card bet, but must remain hot if he wants a shot at playoff glory.

18. Babe (17; -$300)

Still has a shot.

19. The Phoenix (20; -$1,500)

Late picks again, and then two correct bets. One wonders what The Phoenix's season would have been like if you took away his $1,600 worth of fines.

20. Rick Moranis (19; -$2,200)

Took a shot with his Wild Card bet, and lost miserably. And now he's made his fate for the season official: two seasons of Funny Money Football and Rick Moranis has never enjoyed a week on the positive side of zero.

Here's a quick reminder about this year's payouts:

Regular Season

Overall Regular Season - $345
Division Winner - $172.50
Division Winner - $172.50
Division Winner - $172.50

Playoffs

1st - $603.75
2nd - $172.50
3rd - $86.25

Note: All payouts will be made the week after the Super Bowl.

Week 13 Power Rankings

Funny Money Power Rankings - Week 13

The races are tightening up with five weeks to go. The overall leaders are tied, but Gordon Bombay has a slight edge with a winning percentage of .681, just better than Blossom Russo's .671. Thunder Lips made a big move and not controls his playoff fate. In the wild wild West, the first place and last place teams are separated by just $600. Anything can happen as we face a crucial week with three Thanksgiving Day games kicking it all off.

Here are your updated power rankings:

Biggest rise: Brian Piccolo: was 11, now 8
Biggest drop: Mr. Marbled: was 2, now 5; Mr. DeBlasis: was 8, now 11.

(Last week's rank; Current total)

1. Gordon Bombay (1; $2,900)

Was close to another perfect week, but only won $500. Amazingly, still has his wild card bet available.

2. Blossom Russo (3; $2,900)

Log on now to www.notmakingpicksonhisownandpayingsomeguyontheinternettopickforhim.com

3. Thunder Lips (4; $2,100)

A big week once again as those Lips are now challenging for the division and the overall lead.

4. Kimmy Gibbler (5; $1,700)

Managed to win $100 for the week and put some breathing room between him and the rest of the South.

5. Mr. Marbles (2; $1,900)

Was passed by Thunder Lips, but still has a strong grasp of a playoff spot.

6. Bayonnaise (6; $1,300)

Dropped $300 and remains in second place in the South, but fell out of a tie for the division lead and that money prize.

7. The People's Champ (9; $1,100)

Once again, didn't gain anything big, but didn't lose anything big. Reportedly, he also enjoyed a few Schaefer Lights this weekend.

8. Brian Piccolo (11; $800)

Ladies and gentleman, your new leader in the West Division (golf clap).

9. Teddy KGB (7; $1,100)

Tanked two bets this week and dropped out of playoff position. Inconsistency continues to haunt Teddy KGB.

10. The 21th Precinct (10; $700)

Lost $300 on Monday night, lost the lead in the West, but still is in the thick of things.

11. Mr. DeBlasis (8; $800)

Had a real chance to make up ground with the rest of the division faltering in Week 12, but DeBlasis missed the opportunity.

12. Karl Farbman (12; $600)

Pulls out a big, big win on Monday night football to pull within $200 of the West lead as we head down the home stretch.

13. Boss Hardigan (13; $500)

Quietly wins $100, stays in line in the West.

14. Bummy (14; $700)

It looks as though the division title is out of the question, but Bummy is only $600 out of being in the playoffs.

15. Chris B. Corey (15; $200)

A huge $500 week has Corey surging. If only he hadn't bet his wild card so early in the season - ON THE BENGALS!

16. Waldo Geraldo Faldo (17; $200)

Just when I thought Waldo was out, they pulled him back in! A big $500 week puts him just $600 out of the money.

17. Babe (16; -$400)

Getting fined when you are so far out is just going to hurt 'cha, Babe.

18. The Beard of Zeus (18; -$900)

Won $100. The old Turkey Day Wild Card bet is calling you, Beard.

19. Rick Moranis (18; -$1,600)

The race for last place is heating up. Moranis loses $500....

20. The Phoenix (20; -$1,900)

...and The Phoenix outdoes him by not betting and losing $600. Respect points for wagering on college teams Saturday afternoon after knowing his picks were late.

Week 12 Power Rankings

Funny Money Power Rankings - Week 12

Before the Power Rankings, a special note:

A formal protest was submitted by The People's Champ concerning the outcome of the San Diego - Pittsburgh game, which officially ended in an 11-10 win for the Steelers. TPC was protesting the controversial final play of the game, which the officials noted as an error in judgement in the post-game press conference. However, after speaking with Commissioner Roger Goodell, I have decided that the Funny Money Football League must remain consistent with the National Football League's official results. Therefore, the game was put into the books as a 11-10 victory for Pittsburgh, with San Diego covering the spread.

Now, on with the rankings:

An interesting week of betting has four franchises at a $1,600 logjam right in the thick of the playoff picture. No Wild Card bets were made, and only a few franchises won a a great deal and moved up. Likewise, only a couple lost a lot and moved down. For the most part, everyone was treading water in Week 11, and the divisional and playoff races are heating up.

Biggest rise: Thunder Lips: was 8, now 4; Chris B. Corey: was 19, now 15
Biggest drop: Waldo Geraldo Faldo: was 14, now 17; The Phoenix: was 17, now 20

(Last week's rank; Current total)

1. Gordon Bombay (1; $2,600)

Bombay dropped $100 this week, but maintained the same divisional lead. However, his overall lead could be in jeopardy...

2. Mr. Marbles (2; $2,000)

Had a chance to get closer to the money but let it slip away with a sub-par week of betting.

3. Blossom Russo (4; $2,400)

Blossom won $500, distanced himself further from the boring East Division and is just $200 behind the overall leader. He would be a bit higher in the Power Rankings, but he sent an email to Karl Farbman gloating about his big week. Act like you've been there before.

4. Thunder Lips (8; $1,600)

Being tardy to the party was the only thing between Thunder Lips and a perfect week. However, this $400 boost has him right in the playoff hunt.

5. Kimmy Gibbler (3; $1,600)

Late bets on top of losing $100 and Gibbler is now tied with Bayonnaise for the South lead. He currently holds the winning percentage tiebreaker, but even that is a number that has been heading downhill as of late.

6. Bayonnaise (6; $1,600)

Rising to the top, is this the week that Bayonnaise grabs the division lead?

7. Teddy KGB (5; $1,600)

Teddy didn't lose or gain ground this week, but the next two or three weeks of bets are crucial for his playoff chances before we head to the home stretch of the season.

8. Mr. DeBlasis (11; $1,100)

De-Blas-is! (to the tune of By Mennen) A $500 week has put Mr. DeBlasis within reach of the divisional lead and a member of the crowded playoff picture.

9. The People's Champ (7; $1,200)

Was on the losing end of the controversial Pittsburgh-San Diego game and filed a tactful, well-written protest which was ultimately denied. However, his sophistication and professionalism did not go unnoticed. Also, he has great taste in ex-girlfriends.

10. The 21th Precinct (9; $1,000)

The Precinct held onto the West lead - for now. He also claims not to be a fan of the Thursday NFL games, but since these games have been on, all he's done is risen up the standings.

11. Brian Piccolo (10; $900)

Stayed right on the heels of the 21th Precinct.

12. Karl Farbman (13; $500)

Eked out a win on Sunday night in order to avoid taking a $500 loss for the week.

13. Boss Hardigan (15; $400)

The resurgence of Hardigan continues. With another $500 week, he has taken advantage of the rest of the West's mediocrity of late. Right in the mix.

14. Bummy (12; $600)

We'll see ya, Bummy. Not likely you'll catch Blossom Russo. We'll see ya.

15. Chris B. Corey (19; -$300)

Chris B. Corey marches back towards the positive side of zero with a $500 week.

16. Babe (16; -$200)

Late picks, but good ones. Won $400 in Week 11.

17. Waldo Geraldo Faldo (14; -$300)

The rare -$600 week came out of late and awful picks. Waldo went from being right in contention out West to the cellar in one quick weekend.

18. The Beard of Zeus (20; -$1,000)

Go shawty, it's your birthday.

19. Rick Moranis (18; -$1,100)

Show me something. Anything.

20. The Phoenix (17; -$1,300)

Yikes.

Week 11 Power Rankings

Funny Money Power Rankings - Week 11

Teddy KGB splashed the Wild Card pot with a winning bet on Dem Rayyyvens, but couldn't crack even the top two in the North. However, he did put himself in playoff position. The bottom of the league has risen collectively, with $-1000 being the lowest total as of this week. Eight teams have their Wild Card bets on the shelf. Who's next?

Here are your updated power rankings:

Biggest rise: Teddy KGB: was 8, now 5; Thunder Lips: was 11, now 8; Brian Piccolo: was 13, now 10
Biggest drop: Karl Farbman: was 7, now 13

(Last week's rank; Current total)

1. Gordon Bombay (1; $2,700)

Another week, another $500 for Bombay. He put even more distance between him and the rest of the league.

2. Mr. Marbles (2; $2,100)

Marbles leads the Wild Card Playoff Race, and remains a step behind the league leader, trying to make it a battle down the stretch.

3. Kimmy Gibbler (3; $1,800)

Speaking of battles, Gibbler holds a slight advantage in the South, but has formidable opponents in the rearview mirror.

4. Blossom Russo (5; $1,900)

Blossom still has a commanding lead in the East and still has a good shot at the big bucks: the overall regular season champ.

5. Teddy KGB (8; $1,700)

He hit the big bet and now must keep his game honed for the remainder of the season if he wants to make the playoffs.

6. Bayonnaise (6; $1,700)

A late bet cost Bayonnaise from winning $500, but other than that he had a flawless Week 10.

7. The People's Champ (4; $1,300)

Something tells me that the People's Champ is the most dangerous franchise in the league right now. He is lying in the weeds...

8. Thunder Lips (11; $1,200)

After a few down weeks, Thunder Lips is back in the hunt and must keep up his strong winning percentage or hope that those in front of him start making stale picks.

9. The 21th Precinct (9; $900)

The Precinct quietly rose up the standings and has taken over the West. It should be a good race for the remainder of the year - all five franchises are within $1000 of each other.

10. Brian Piccolo (13; $800)

Piccolo is nipping at the Precinct's heels after a big $500 week.

11. Mr. DeBlasis (10; $600)

Just another ho-hum week for DeBlasis.

12. Bummy (12; $700)

Five-teamer. ZZZZzzzzZZZZ

13. Karl Farbman (7; $400)

I'd love to give you a ride, but I've got Karl Farbman in here. Terrible picks. -$500 for the week.

14. Waldo Geraldo Faldo (14; $300)

Waldo returns! A perfect week has him within earshot of the division lead! What a two week turnaround. Plus $1500 in two short weeks.

15. Boss Hardigan (16; $-100)

A perfect week for Boss Hardigan put him back in contention in the West as well.

16. Babe (15; $-600)

Lost $100 - stick a fork in Babe, he's done.

17. The Phoenix (17; -$800)

The Phoenix looks to be done, too. Especially since he's already used his Wild Card bet.

18. Rick Moranis (18; -$800)

Moranis is hanging around. And now the campaign is over. Time for a surge?

19. Chris B. Corey (19; -$800)

The world travels of Chris B. Corey produce another good week. But if history is any guide, he'll lost $500 this week.

20. The Beard of Zeus (20; -$1,000)

Time to pull out the big bet, big boy?

Week 10 Power Rankings – Rolling Stones Edition

Funny Money Power Rankings - Week 10 - Rolling Stones Edition

A week of ups and downs had Gordon Bombay increasing his lead, Bummy and Waldo Geraldo Faldo getting back into the mix by winning their wild card bets, and Boss Hardigan falling to the cellar of the West Division in losing his wild card. And now, your rankings and comments with special guest commentator, Mick Jagger.

Here are your updated power rankings:

Biggest rise: Waldo Geraldo Faldo: was 20, now 14
Biggest drop: Boss Hardigan: was 10, now 16

(Last week's rank; Current total)

1. Gordon Bombay (1; $2,200)

Bombay can't get no Satisfaction - increased his lead, won $500, and still hasn't had to use the wild card bet yet. He's on top, yet just never looks back.

2. Mr. Marbles (3; $1,800)

Mr. Marbles sees a wager and he wants to Paint It, Black. He made some money this week but is still trying to catch Bombay. It's not easy facing up when your whole world is black.

3. Kimmy Gibbler (4; $1,900)

Can't You Hear Her Knocking? Gibbler is on the doorstep of the overall lead, but late picks this week hurt her.

4. The People's Champ (5; $1,400)

Though the Champ's back is broad, it's a hurtin. He won $500 but is still in second in his division. Will he return to glory or remain a Beast of Burden? Is he rough enough? Is he tough enough?

5. Blossom Russo (2; $1,400)

A few weeks ago Blossom looked to have a division title Under His Thumb, but now Bummy has made some noise and is within striking distance.

6. Bayonnaise (7; $1,300)

Who could ever put a name on Bayonnaise? He won $500 on the week while the sun was bright, but no one knows how the upcoming Ruby Thursdays will treat him.

7. Karl Farbman (6; $900)

I know It's Only the Funny Money Power Rankings, but I like it.

8. Teddy KGB (9; $1,100)

No Sympathy for the Teddy - he was pleased to meet a perfect week of betting and it has him in prime position to grab a playoff berth.

9. The 21th Precinct (11; $800)

The Precinct Can't Always Get What He Wants, but if he tries sometimes, he just might find, he's $100 out of the division lead.

10. Mr. DeBlasis (8; $800)

The Street Fighting Man of the Funny Money, DeBlasis remained on the bubble for the playoffs.

11. Thunder Lips (12; $700)

Like a little bit of Brown Sugar, Thunder Lips sweetened his chances by having a big week, but needs another one to solidify his spot among the league's elite.

12. Bummy (14; $600)

Time is On the Side of Bummy, who aced his wild card bet and is now only $800 out of the lead in the East. He'll coming running back to the lead.

13. Brian Piccolo (13; $300)

Some Girls give me money, Some Girls buy me clothes, but Piccolo just wishes Some Girls would give him winning bets.

14. Waldo Geraldo Faldo (20; $-200)

Born in a crossfire hurricane, Jumpin Jack, err Waldo, had a $1,000 winning week to leap out of the basement in the West.

15. Babe (15; $-500)

Well, he used to be in contentionnnnn, but It's All Over Now. He used to be in contentionnnnn, but It's All Over Now.

16. Boss Hardigan (10; $-600)

Boss Hardigan rolled the Tumbling Dice in Week 9 and ended up losing the farm. Pair a lost wild card with late picks, and he dropped $1,100 for the week. Got to keep on rollin'.

17. The Phoenix (19; -$700)

Tell Me, he's coming back in the league. You've got to Tell me, he's coming back in the league.

18. Rick Moranis (17; -$800)

It wasn't Rick Moranis's 19th Nervous Breakdown, it was just another mediocre week that has him way back in the standings.

19. Chris B. Corey (18; -$1,300)

Don't hang around, cause two's a crowd. The lonely drifter, Chris B. Corey, might be packing it in for the season.

20. The Beard of Zeus (16; -$1,500)

This could be the last time, this could be the last time, this could be the last time, we hear from Zeus....I don't know.

Week 9 Power Rankings

Funny Money Power Rankings - Week 9

The real winner in Week 9 was the oddsmaker - two games were pushes, and three other games were within two points. The league put a lot of money on Buffalo, including Babe, who bet his wild card, and thus, a lot of money was lost this week. The Phoenix also dropped his wild card bet, while Mr. DeBlasis won his. Halfway home, the playoff picture is coming into focus.

Here are your updated power rankings:

Biggest rise: Mr. DeBlasis: was 13, now 8
Biggest drop: Babe: was 10, now 15

(Last week's rank; Current total)

1. Gordon Bombay (2; $1,700)

Weather the storm in Week 8 but just inching up the standings, while keeping Mr. Marbles in his rearview mirror.

2. Blossom Russo (3; $1,700)

Lucky for her, two of Russo's divisional opponents lost their wild card bets, making his lead in the division an astonishing $1,900.

3. Mr. Marbles (4; $1,500)

Kept pace with Bombay, and is currently in a playoff position.

4. Kimmy Gibbler (1; $1,500)

Lost share of the overall lead, but didn't slip too far back.

5. The People's Champ (8; $900)

Plays musical chairs with Bayonnaise and remains a shout away from Gibbler for the South crown.

6. Karl Farbman (9; $1,000)

Managed to eke out one win and one push to take back control in the West Division. He and Hardigan have flip-flopped in the last few weeks, but Farbman has a $500 cushion.

7. Bayonnaise (5; $800)

Having already used his wild card bet, Bayonnaise needs to pull out some winning weeks if he wants to keep pace. He's already play his ace card.

8. Mr. DeBlasis (13; $700)

A huge week for DeBlasis, as he rode dem Rayyyvens to a wild card win. This gets him back into the mix, but can he run with the big dogs?

9. Teddy KGB (6; $600)

Lost $500. Time for the wild card bet. Do it.

10. Boss Hardigan (7; $500)

Slipped back in the West, and was lucky not to lose $500 on the week, saved by the New England push.

11. The 21th Precinct (14; $300)

Moved up in the division and has hung around long enough to make some noise in the playoff race. Is Week 9 the week he gets that $500 push he needs?

12. Thunder Lips (12; $200)

A mediocre week for Thunder Lips, who only bet, gulp, two teams this week! We'll see how this strategy works out in the weeks to come.

13. Brian Piccolo (11; $200)

Dropped down again, and is now fourth in the West.

14. Bummy (15; -$200)

Might be time to make a run for the division. Babe and the Phoenix have dropped back, and Russo is running away with it.

15. Babe (10; $-400)

Lost $1,000 for the week, but couldn't have done it in better company.

16. The Beard of Zeus (20; -$1,000)

AND THE BEARD IS ALIIIIIIIIIVVVVEEEEEEE!

17. Rick Moranis (17; -$700)

Can't fight as well as his Phils. Needs to get back into things.

18. Chris B. Corey (16; -$800)

Needs to win some games, and needs to stop trying so hard to make jokes with his bets (for Chris, Atlanta = The Real Housewives of Eric Snow).

19. The Phoenix (18; -$1,100)

His wild card bet across the pond didn't come through, and you can almost guarantee that this Phoenix won't be rising any time soon.

20. Waldo Geraldo Faldo (19; $-1,200)

Fell back again. Lost $500. But a Dewey Beach trip might have cured what ails him.

Week 8 Power Rankings

Funny Money Power Rankings - Week 8

A brutal week in some respects for the league dropped the playoff race teams back a few steps. Blossom Russo and Mr. Marbles both hit their Tennessee Wild Card bets, while four teams had late picks, and one team didn't pick at all.

Here are your updated power rankings:

Biggest rise: Mr. Marbles: was 12, now 4
Biggest drop: Brian Piccolo: was 4, now 11

(Last week's rank; Current total)

1. Kimmy Gibbler (2; $1,600)

Gibbler survived a brutal Week 7 and managed to increase his divisional lead, but now trails in the overall picture.

2. Gordon Bombay (1; $1,500)

Late picks and an average week drop Bombay from the number one spot. Don't look now, but his lead in the division is only $100 after being huge last week.

3. Blossom Russo (9; $1,800)

$1,000 increase in Week 7 vaulted Blossom to the top of the standings. But can he sustain this pace with his picks (or the picks of the "Gambling Insider" website that he is using) in the remaining weeks?

4. Mr. Marbles (12; $1,400)

Following in Blossom's footsteps with oddly (??) similar picks, he also won $1,000.

5. Bayonnaise (3; $900)

Dropped five hundo on the week and is now only within a shouting distance of the South lead.

6. Teddy KGB (8; $1,100)

Managed to eke out $100 for the week and now faces the challenge of staying in the thick of things in the North, by far the best division in Funny Money right now.

7. Boss Hardigan (7; $900)

Back on top in the West, even though he had a lackluster week.

8. The People's Champ (6; $800)

Late picks and big negative numbers.

9. Karl Farbman (5; $800)

Lost $500. Weak.

10. Babe (11; $600)

Was leading the East last week, but now is trailing by $1,200. Time for the Wild Card bet, there Babe?

11. Brian Piccolo (4; $600)

Lost $500. Drank Sparks.

12. Thunder Lips (10; $300)

No bets at all for Thunder Lips, which made him drop way back in the North. After a season of conservative betting, he's fallen out of contention after losing $600.

13. Mr. DeBlasis (19; $-100)

A huge week for Mr. DeBlasis, who got back into the playoff race with a $500 week.

14. The 21th Precinct (14; $100)

Yawn. Right around $0. Show me something, Precinct, show me something.

15. Bummy (18; -$100)

The good news is Bummy won some cash last week in the Funny Money. But how bout them Red Sox?

16. Chris B. Corey (13; -$600)

Last week: won $500. This week: lost $500. But, all things considered, he has a lot of things on his mind, since he's soon to open Risque, the sister bar of Lakewood's Club Twist.

17. Rick Moranis (15; -$600)

Shuffled back to his old ways by betting a five teamer, but losing four of the games. But when the campaign trail ends, and Moranis can get back on track, he could be dangerous.

18. The Phoenix (17; -$500)

Another week of late picks, just crushing the Phoenix's hopes and dreams.

19. Waldo Geraldo Faldo (16; $-700)

Made late picks, and then all of his picks were wrong, saddling Waldo with a $600 loss for the week. His consolation prize is chicken wings.

20. The Beard of Zeus (20; -$1,500)

Bye, bye, Beardy.

Week 7 Power Rankings

Funny Money Power Rankings - Week 7

Brian Piccolo surges into the playoff picture with a $1,000 week. He won his wild card despite Ryan Fitzpatrick's best effort to rally the Bengals against the Jets. For the most part, other franchises stayed where they were last week, with the exception of Boss Hardigan who took a $500 hit, and Blossom Russo and Chris B. Corey, who each won $500. The Giants' loss on Monday night prevented a lot of franchises from perfect weeks.

Here are your updated power rankings:

Biggest rise: Brian Piccolo: was 13, now 4
Biggest drop: Thunder Lips: was 5, now 10

(Last week's rank; Current total)

1. Gordon Bombay (1; $1,900)

Increased his divisional and overall lead, but late picks prevented him from reaching the $2,000 mark.

2. Kimmy Gibbler (2; $1,500)

Secured the lead in the South for another week, but something tells me that Week 7 is the week he drops down.

3. Bayonnaise (4; $1,400)

Stayed quietly in second place in his division and within earshot of the overall lead.

4. Brian Piccolo (13; $1,100)

A HUGE week vaulted Piccolo into second place in the West, but will he fall right back into his $100 win or loss pattern? Time will tell.

5. Karl Farbman (6; $1,300)

Took over the West lead due to Hardigan's fall from the top, but has Piccolo nipping at his heels.

6. The People's Champ (7; $1,200)

Began the week looking as if he was going to make a big move, but his chances faded off like an Eli Manning pass.

7. Boss Hardigan (3; $1,000)

Lost $500. Lost his Speedo. Grew a mustache.

8. Teddy KGB (8; $1,000)

Fell further behind the overall leader, and is currently on the outside looking in for the playoffs.

9. Blossom Russo (10; $800)

Big $500 week and it looks as if fatty Russo will take over Babe this week in the East.

10. Thunder Lips (5; $900)

Another five teamer, yawn. Zzzzzzzz.

11. Babe (9; $900)

"This is why we can't have nice things."

12. Mr. Marbles (11; $400)

Time for the wild card bet? I think so. I think so.

13. Chris B. Corey (19; -$100)

Back from the dead, Chris B. Corey is close to positive money! To celebrate, he plans to throw out the first pitch at an Indians game.

14. The 21th Precinct (12; $0)

Should the Precinct follow Piccolo's lead and go for the gusto before he falls further behind?

15. Rick Moranis (16; -$300)

Late picks cost him an additional $100, but he's moving closer to the Equator.

16, Waldo Geraldo Faldo (15; $-100)

Brown water season has hurt his wagering.

17. The Phoenix (14; -$500)

Boring.

18. Bummy (18; -$400)

More boring.

19. Mr. DeBlasis (17; $-600)

DeBlasis is fading away, slowly but surely, and needs to turn things around fast as the halfway point of the season approaches.

20. The Beard of Zeus (20; -$1,400)

It looks like the end for the Beard.

Week 6 Power Rankings

Funny Money Power Rankings - Week 6

With a ton of league money on Indianapolis last week, scoring 21 points in the last four minutes and covering was huge for many franchises. Things were shaken up at the top, as the People's Champ was dethroned. Bayonnaise cashed in on his Wild Card bet, and a few division leaders changed as we head into Week 6.

Here are your updated power rankings:

Biggest rise: Bayonnaise: was 8, now 4
Biggest drop: The People's Champ: was 1, now 7; Mr. Marbles: was 5, now 11

(Last week's rank; Current total)

1. Gordon Bombay (2; $1,700)

Kept it going by picking up a few critical wins - takes over the top spot after the People's Champ fell considerably.

2. Kimmy Gibbler (3; $1,400)

Gibbler's rise to the top continues. She is now first in the ultra-competitive South Division.

3. Boss Hardigan (6; $1,500)

Had a perfect week with Farbman right on his tail and is challenging for the overall lead.

4. Bayonnaise (8; $1,300)

The Naise pulled out the Wild Card and it paid off handsomely. His Jacksonville bet kept him from the $1000 week, but he has put himself in playoff position.

5. Thunder Lips (4; $1,000)

The rare $0 week for Thunder Lips has him moving slightly up the rankings, but now the competition has grown in the playoff race. Will he continue to bet five-teamers?

6. Karl Farbman (7; $1,200)

Won $500 this week, but couldn't pick up any ground on Boss Hardigan.

7. The People's Champ (1; $1,100)

Fells Fest or not, the Champ just lost focus. His picks were late and he lost some cash. He dropped out of the overall lead and into third in his division. You better start swimming or you'll sink like a stone.

8. Teddy KGB (9; $900)

A perfect week put KGB amid the league leaders. One of only two teams to bet the minimum two-teamer each week thus far, Teddy has been up and down all season. Experts say a -$500 week is in store this week if history is any guide.

9. Babe (12; $600)

Babe used a deadly combination of whiskey and late night drunk dials to his neighbor to  regain the lead in the East, which is starting to become a somewhat respectable division.

10. Blossom Russo (11; $300)

Still has Babe in her sites.

11. Mr. Marbles (5; $300)

-$500. Drop it like it's hot. Drop, drop it like it's hot.

12. The 21th Precinct (15; $100)

The Precinct boldly prognosticated that Week 5 was when he'd get back in the positive, and he comes through. Also, via tiebreaker, moves from last place out West into third.

13. Brian Piccolo (13; $100)

Weird. Piccolo had another week in which he either lost or won $100. Weird.

14. The Phoenix (14; -$400)

Just when I think the Phoenix is ready to make his move, he puts on a knit hat and makes terrible picks.

15. Waldo Geraldo Faldo (10; $0)

Waldo plummets to last place in the West and might want to call on Urkel for his picks this week. It's not the bets that he makes, it's the bets that he doesn't make.

16. Rick Moranis (19; -$500)

By way of a winning percentage tie, for the first time in the HISTORY of the Funny Money Football League, Moranis has emerged from last place in his division. Something tells me he's in for something good.

17. Mr. DeBlasis (17; $-500)

Dropped to the cellar in the South.

18. Bummy (18; -$500)

Bummy's Wild Card bet is coming. I can feel it.

19. Chris B. Corey (16; -$600)

Nothing really gained, nothing really lost. Since his retirement, Corey has lost his star power. Show me something.

20. The Beard of Zeus (20; -$1,300)

Late picks followed by bad picks. But the Executive Director does have to mention that the Beard of Zeus did treat him to three shots of Rumpleminze and four Budweisers on Saturday. That has to count for something.

Week 5 Power Rankings

Funny Money Power Rankings - Week 5

The league feasted on the Vegas lines in Week 5: Seven franchises won $500, and for the first time this season no team lost $500. Thus, the Power Rankings only shifted slightly this week, but the divisional races are heating up. And as the weeks pass, the wild card bets (sans Chris B. Corey) remain on the shelf. Who will pull the trigger first? Also, if last season was any guide, a week of feasting for the league usually was shortly followed by a week of famine.

Here are your updated power rankings:

Biggest rise: Teddy KGB: was 14, now 9; The Phoenix: was 19, now 14
Biggest drop: Boss Hardigan: was 3, now 6; Brian Piccolo: was 10, now 13; The 21th Precinct: was 12, now 15

(Last week's rank; Current total)

1. The People's Champ (1; $1,400)

His perfect season came to an end, but only lost $100. Don't look now, but the league is nipping at his heels....

2. Gordon Bombay (2; $1.400)

Bombay continues to rise - could he take over in Week 5?

3. Kimmy Gibbler (5; $1,200)

I never thought I'd say this: Kimmy Gibbler is hot. Not the sitcom character, though. The Funny Money franchise. Another perfect week put her in prime position.

4. Thunder Lips (7; $1,000)

The much-talked about "system" works again. Four games bet, four wins. You don't want to mess with the Thunder Lips right now.

5. Mr. Marbles (4; $800)

Hanging around, for now, but has to deal with both Bombay and Thunder in his division.

6. Boss Hardigan (3; $1,000)

Another week comes, another week goes with Hardigan making a slight increase. He's still looking for momentum.

7. Karl Farbman (6; $700)

Keeps pace with Hardigan, but still hasn't done much since a $500 Week 1.

8. Bayonnaise (8; $700)

The roller coaster ride continues - Bayonnaise wins $500 and gets back into the playoff picture.

9. Teddy KGB (14; $400)

Speaking of ups and downs, KGB rebounds from a few bad weeks to get back on the positive side of the chip count.

10. Waldo Geraldo Faldo (9; $400)

Don't count him out in the West. Also, don't eat his onion rings.

11. Blossom Russo (13; $200)

In my opinionation, the sun is gonna surely shine. Blossom takes over first in the East!

12. Babe (11; $200)

Oh Babe, you lead in the East is gone.

13. Brian Piccolo (10; $0)

After four weeks, he's back to square one. Wild card time?

14. The Phoenix (19; -$200)

When he makes his bets on time, the Phoenix is hard to beat. But so far, he's only done that half the time.

15. The 21th Precinct (12; $-200)

Falling behind out West.

16. Chris B. Corey (20; -$500)

Is Chris back? A $500 week has him inching back closer to even money. He needs another big week before any one else starts to notice him and his Prada handbag.

17. Mr. DeBlasis (15; $-400)

Went into his shell and bet a five-teamer. I smell a wild card bet in Week 5.

18. Bummy (16; -$600)

When the Phoenix passes you in the standings, you know you're on the wrong track.

19. Rick Moranis (17; -$800)

Step by step, Moranis might be the most dangerous cellar dweller in the league.

20. The Beard of Zeus (18; -$1,000)

Has proven nothing so far this year, other than he needs to "lock it up."

Week 4 Power Rankings

Funny Money Power Rankings - Week 4

Both the #1 and #2 teams in the rankings this week continued their winning ways. For the most part the rest of the league hovered around the Equator in Week 3. A few exceptions were a rise by Gibbler and a fall by Babe and Mr. DeBlasis.

Here are your updated power rankings:

Biggest rise: Kimmy Gibbler: was 11, now 5
Biggest drop: Babe: was 6, now 11

(Last week's rank; Current total)

1. The People's Champ (1; $1,500)

DiMaggio's hit streak. The Miami Dolphins' undefeated season. Hall & Oates' string of #1 hits. The Champ's flawless season after three weeks is drawing comparisons to other great feats of perfection.

2. Gordon Bombay (2; $1.300)

Bombay wins $500 for the second week in a row and keeps the overall lead in his sights.

3. Boss Hardigan (3; $900)

Only gained $100 last week, but still the Boss of the West.

4. Mr. Marbles (5; $700)

Marbles stayed closed to Bombay and rumor has it that his secret is drinking a bottle of Ten High prior to making his picks each week.

5. Kimmy Gibbler (11; $700)

And Gibbler is alive and well! A perfect week has him cracking into the Top 5.

6.  Karl Farbman (4; $600)

Another average week after coming out the gate strong. Farbman must design a winning week soon if he wants to catch the Boss before he gets too far away.

7. Thunder Lips (7; $500)

Does his system work? Another four teamer - and three correct picks. But Bombay is pulling away....

8. Bayonnaise (8; $200)

After a big Week 2, the 'Naise returned to bland form.

9. Waldo Geraldo Faldo (10; $300)

Waldo survived a mediocre week in the West, but can look back at this week as one where he could have gained ground.

10. Brian Piccolo (14; $100)

Piccolo is still breathing, but just barely. Could go either way.

11. Babe (6; $100)

Babe lost $500, but still leads the East. Could a negative total win the division?

12. The 21th Precinct (13; $-100)

Mediocrity won't win the west, but there's still a lot of season left and the Precinct is within relative striking distance.

13. Blossom Russo (9; $-300)

Sunk down in total but not in the rankings in the East.

14. Teddy KGB (12; $-100)

No splashing the pot this week: after a big Week 1, Teddy has lost steam.

15. Mr. DeBlasis (15; $-500)

Oh, Mr. DeBlasis, you lost all your bets and fell way behind the league leader. Time to pull out the wild card bet?

16. Bummy (17; -$500)

Tardy picks and bad bets make Bummy a dull boy.

17. Rick Moranis (20; -$900)

Moranis might need the help of Dr. Peter Venkman this week to continue to rise up the Power Rankings.

18. The Beard of Zeus (18; -$900)

Got off the proverbial schnide by winning a game! Things are really starting to snowball for the god.

19. The Phoenix (16; -$700)

No picks this week. The Phoenix has descended.

20. Chris B. Corey (19; -$1,000)

Down so low, winning a meager $100 isn't going to cut the mustard.

Week 3 Power Rankings

Funny Money Power Rankings - Week 3

The majority of the franchises held their collective breath as Green Bay and Detroit squared off in a thriller. Thirteen teams bet the Packers to see them go up by 21, then lose the lead, then score 24 straight in the 4th quarter. Many franchises saw their week saved by the Packers defense. Chris B. Corey, who lives his life just like his tattoo says: "Get Rich or Die Tryin," lost his Wild Card bet, an $800 wager on the Bungles. I guess he died tryin. A few lucky teams won $500 this week, as the cream starts to rise to the top in each division.

Here are your updated power rankings:

Biggest rise: Bayonnaise: was 16, now 8
Biggest drop: Teddy KGB: was 3, now 12

(Last week's rank; Current total)

1. The People's Champ (1; $1,000)

So glamourous, so glamourous, glamourous, oh the flossy flossy. The People's Champ stays perfect on the season.

2. Gordon Bombay (4; $800)

The Minnesota Miracle Man rises up and wins $500, putting him in a familiar spot on the top tier of the league.

3. Boss Hardigan (5; $800)

Newcomer Boss wins $500 as well, proving he can swim with the big fish, even though he is wearing a terrible speedo.

4. Karl Farbman (2; $500)

A win, a loss, and a push aren't going to get it done for Farbman. He could be moving on down if he doesn't take care of business.

5. Mr. Marbles (7; $600)

Mr. Marbles, who moonlights as the lead singer of the hit Cleveland area band "The Qdoba Boys," inched his way further towards the lead this week.

6. Babe (10; $600)

Babe proved in Week 2 that even absolute busts deserve a second chance. A perfect week has him leading the East.

7. Thunder Lips (12; $400)

Another rookie that is making a name for himself early on. Thunder Lips has bet on a league high nine games thus far, but has won six of them. Good show.

8. Bayonnaise (16; $300)

You can't 86 the Bayonnaise on a delicious Week 2. Bayo won $500 and put himself in the thick of things after a lackluster opening week.

9. Blossom Russo (14; $200)

Blossom rises slightly and needs to capitalize on the momentum she built in Week 2.

10. Waldo Geraldo Faldo (6; $200)

Waldo dropped down four spots, just as "Family Matters" did when "Dinosaurs!" led off the TGIF lineup.

11. Kimmy Gibbler (11; $200)

Medium. Medium. Medium.

12. Teddy KGB (3; $0)

Week 1: Two for two. Week 2: Zero for two. Too bad he didn't consult his baby's mama first before betting.

13. The 21th Precinct (13; $0)

Don't look now, but the 21th is falling behind in the West - no teams are in the negative.

14. Brian Piccolo (8; $200)

Hasn't shown much in the first two weeks, but could go on a run in Week 3.

15. Mr. DeBlasis (9; $0)

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

16. The Phoenix (18; -$100)

Got back on track by winning $100 on the week.

17. Bummy (17; -$300)

Poor showing so far. And to think they used to call Bummy "The Executor."

18. The Beard of Zeus (19; -$1,000)

The Curse of the Kudler has struck. No correct bets thus far.

19. Chris B. Corey (15; -$1,100)

Lost his Wild Card bet, but salvaged a little bit on the Indy comeback. There are still 15 weeks left, but already it looks unlikely that Chris will be in the playoffs.

20. Rick Moranis (20; -$1,000)

Didn't make his picks. At all. Lost $600. Here's shovel, can you dig it fool?

Week 2 Power Rankings

Funny Money Power Rankings - Week 2

The season got off to a bang with the Giants winning the opener, making several franchises happy. But Cincy's loss and Detroit making Atlanta look flawless killed a few franchises' hopes of a perfect week. The West is best in Week 1, and the East is least. Here are your updated power rankings:

Biggest rise: Waldo Geraldo Faldo; was 18, now 6

Biggest drop: The Phoenix; was 5, now 18 and Chris B. Corey; was 2 now 15

(Last week's rank; Current total)

1. The People's Champ (1; $500)

The self-proclaimed champion of the populous picked up in 2008 where he left off in '07.

2. Karl Farbman (6; $500)

Benefitted from Reggie Bush leading the Saints back in the 4th quarter, but must keep pace in the West.

3. Teddy KGB (9; $500)

Start spreading the news - Teddy rode the Giants and Jets to a perfect week.

4. Gordon Bombay (3; $300)

Stayed close in the highly competitive North Division.

5. Boss Hardigan (7; $300)

Though he didn't have his "lucky" Jeff Hostetler jersey for Week 1, Hardigan would've had a perfect week if it was for dem Rayyyvens.

6. Waldo Geraldo Faldo (18; $500)

Is this a sign of things to come or a flash in the pan? Waldo rode the coattails of Aaron Rodgers and Eddie Winslow to a flawless inaugural week.

7. Mr. Marbles (15; $300)

Mr. Marbles? He's harmless! Creeping around once again, Marbles stayed in the thick of things up North.

8. Brian Piccolo (14; $100)

Brian's song this week: close but no cigar. One win, one loss. Still a lot to be determined for the young franchise.

9. Mr. DeBlasis (4; -$100)

The golden arm of Jon Kitna couldn't save Mr. DeBlasis this week.

10. Babe (16 $100)

Like a rousing karaoke rendition of a Styx song, Babe left something to be desired, yet is atop his division.

11. Kimmy Gibbler (11; -$100)

Mediocrity in Week 1 will keep Gibbler in the race in the South, but she needs to turn things around to stay close to The People's Champ.

12. Thunder Lips (8; $100)

Some may say betting a five-teamer is great strategy; others say it lacks cajones. Either way, Thunder Lips got off to a positive start in 2008.

13. The 21th Precinct (19; $100)

Getting his feet wet, the 21th Precinct must stay on track to contend in the wild wild West.

14. Blossom Russo (10; -$100)

For now, a small loss will allow for Blossom to survive in the East.

15. Chris B. Corey (2; -$500)

Continuing his world tour, Chris B. Corey let down his legions of fans with a terrible week of picks. Yet, he still remains a player to watch.

16. Bayonnaise (13; -$200)

Started '08 with tardy bets, which can come back to haunt a franchise later in the year.

17. Bummy (17; -$100)

Bet blindly without point spreads and lived to tell about it. For now.

18. The Phoenix (5; -$200)

7th Floor Crew says: "What's your name? THE PHOENIX! What you do? MAKE LATE PICKS!"

19. The Beard of Zeus (12; -$500)

The Beard has to summon some strength to bounce back in Week 2.

20. Rick Moranis (20; -$400)

No luck for Moranis. Made tardy bets and missed on two. On the bright side, he did pick one game right in Week 1! Baby steps. Baby steps.

Week 1 Power Rankings

Funny Money Football  - Week 1 Power Rankings

(Last year's regular season total; divisional finish; playoff finish)

1. The People's Champ ($1,400; 2nd in West - Wild Card Team; Won Playoffs)

After an all-around successful campaign in 2007, The People's Champ is back looking for more this year. He will have a tough road back to the top, as all of the franchises in his division (South), are returning members of the Funny Money.

2. Chris B. Corey ($2,400; 1st in North; 5th in Playoffs)

The recently retired Chris B. Corey no longer has to worry about petty things like work emails and conference calls. This year, he can concentrate on the only two things that matter: chicken wings and Funny Money Football.

3. Gordon Bombay ($2,400; 1st in West; 4th in Playoffs)

Bombay dominated for almost all of the regular season, but then stumbled down the stretch, hung on to win his division title, and then fell off the map in the playoffs. Which Bombay will show up in '08? The genius of weeks 1-13 last year or the one that faltered towards the end of the season?

4. Mr. DeBlasis ($0; 4th in West; Missed Playoffs)

An unsung hero of the 2007 season, Mr. DeBlasis was surging late in the season. If not for a lackluster first half, he would have certainly been a contender. Also, the mass media has declared him as the "sexy" upset pick of the year in the FMFL.

5. The Phoenix (Expansion Season)

The Phoenix was the only member of the FMFL who protested mandatory steroid testing during training camp, claiming the only thing he is on is, "Whey protein." Will he have the brains to match the brawn? If not, let's hope he doesn't physically manhandle the Executive Director a la Turkey Bowl 2003.

6. Karl Farbman ($1,100; 3rd in West; Missed Playoffs)

Though he is known outside of the Funny Money Football realm for his boyish charm and chiseled abs, Karl Farbman was a psychological train-wreck last season, finishing the year just $100 out of the playoffs, and making foolish wagers the last three weeks of the season with everything on the line. Yet with his experience, the outlook for him in 2008 is positive.

7. Boss Hardigan (Expansion Season)

As Boss Hardigan tells it, he was the puppet-master behind Bayonnaise last season, assisting him with many of his bets. Other sources say this is blatantly false. Now he has the chance to show the 'Naise once and for all who the greater prognosticator is.

8. Thunder Lips (Expansion Season)

Thunder Lips has the daunting task of sharing an apartment with two other expansion franchises (Brian Piccolo and Waldo Geraldo Faldo). He's hoping that the close quarters fosters healthy competition with him outsmarting the rest of his division (Johns Hopkins-style).

9. Teddy KGB ($1,200; 2nd in North - Wild Card Team; 3rd in Playoffs)

Teddy KGB made his money back last season, but was on the brink of a high finish in the playoffs and couldn't close. He might have a little more knowledge this season - since becoming a father, rumor he has it he has logged countless hours of breaking down NFL film while pacing late at night.

10. Blossom Russo ($2,700; 1st in East - 1st Overall; 2nd in Playoffs)

The regular season champ fell just short in the playoffs and is the only returning franchise in his division. He's hoping those new glasses will not only keep him from squinting, but help him see his way through to a second straight trip to the postseason.

11. Kimmy Gibbler (-$2,400; 3rd in East; Missed Playoffs)

The rise and fall of Gibbler last year was much like that of "Greek God" John Stamos' rise to the top during the Full House era, followed by his plummet to the bottom during his post-Uncle Jesse career. Kimmy is hoping for a resurgence this season.

12. The Beard of Zeus (Expansion Season)

Will the gods be smiling on the Beard of Zeus and his mythical strength? Some say yes, others say no, but most are just saying: "Prove it."

13. Bayonnaise (-$1,200; 4th in North; Missed Playoffs)

Spreading himself just a little too thin last year, Bayonnaise showed signs of greatness (winning $500 three consecutive weeks at one point) but also signs of weakness (losing $500 three consecutive weeks). Ultimately, tardy bets cost him as too many fines put him in a hole he couldn't get out of.

14. Brian Piccolo (Expansion Season)

Until Piccolo starts drinking before noon on Sundays (and stops requesting a giant mug of coffee instead of a Budweiser), experts say he'll have a tough time staying relevant in the Funny Money.

15. Mr. Marbles ($1,000; 3rd in North; Missed Playoffs)

After just missing the playoffs last year, Mr. Marbles has a lot more to overcome this go-around if he wants to get to the postseason - mainly, it's the horrid stench of Chris B. Corey that's standing in his way.

16. Babe (Expansion Season)

Babe comes into the season committed to excellence. He has already declared that his in-season diet will only consist of Diet Sprite and late night take-out. Most critics assume this will spell doom for Babe and all those around him.

17. Bummy (Expansion Season)

Known in some fantasy leagues as the Silent Assassin, Bummy's toxic mix of football knowledge, Gatorade, and cigarettes make him some experts' sleeper pick this season. Getting his bets in on time might be a factor in his success.

18. Waldo Geraldo Faldo (Expansion Season)

The key to W.G.F.'s Funny Money season could be motivation. Will he bring his "A" game each and every Sunday? Or will he lie on the couch for hours on end with his laptop on his belly eating stale Cheetos? Only time will tell.

19. The 21th Precinct (Expansion Season)

The eldest member of the FMFL, the 21th Precinct's only advantage this season is that he was watching football before the forward pass was invented.

20. Rick Moranis (-$3,200; 4th in East; Missed Playoffs)

Possibly the returning franchise with the most to prove, Moranis began last season with five straight weeks of incorrect picks. Will he right the ship this year? Or dig himself deeper?